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Mom's Eulogy

Alex Kelly
Teacher
There are many words I could use to describe the woman who’s life we are here to celebrate: Wife, Mother, Grandmother; Aunt, Cousin, Co‐worker; Classmate, Neighbor and Friend ‐ just to name a few. But only one word comes close to justly describing her: teacher.

Teaching was not just a career choice for her. In fact it was not a choice at all. It was
involuntary. She could not help herself. Her favorite method of teaching was by example. Her favorite phrase was “Let me show you”.

By her example, I learned the most important lessons of my life.
She taught me strength. A football player is commonly thought of as having strength. But that’s not strength, that’s force. Strength is losing both parents, and then taking care of your special needs brother, and mentally ill sister, while raising three small children. Strength is giving birth to me. She loved to tell the story about how tough my delivery was. But since I get the last word, I have to set the record straight. When I was born I was barely half my current size.

I learned compassion from her. Compassion is spending your nights baking cookies for elderly widows, and sending my father and I out to deliver them on Christmas eve. Compassion is cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the family of a person you barely know, because you found out he is dying of cancer.

She taught me about priorities. When she was first diagnosed, I expected that she would take some time to do the things she always wanted to do. Today people have started calling that a “Bucket List”, a list of the things you want to do before you kick the bucket. After a couple of years had passed, I got a little frustrated because she hadn’t done anything new, she was still living her life exactly as she had before she was diagnosed. But eventually I figured out that she already had the life she wanted. She didn’t need cancer to help her set her priorities. If it was important, she had already done it. So she had no regrets.

She taught me that one person can change the world. Although she had a modest and
unassuming manner, she has influenced thousands of lives. She was phenomenal teacher, and this community has suffered a tremendous loss with her passing.

And when the cancer spread to her brain, I learned that there are things worse than dying.

I could go on for hours about the things she taught me. But the final lesson I learned is the difference between having a mailing address and being part of a community. Days like today are the reason you chose to live in small town. My family and I have been stunned by the sheer number of people who have come to pay their respects. But I was even more impressed by the number of people who visited her when she was alive. This community and this church have provided her and my entire family with a great deal of comfort during these past months. You have a made terrible situation tolerable. And we will not soon forget it.